"Give Honor Where Honor Is Due"

“Give to everyone what you owe them:

If you owe taxes, pay taxes; 

if revenue, then revenue; 

if respect, then respect; 

if honor, then honor.”

Romans 13:7 (KJV)

Do we give everyone what we owe them? Recently I realized that I hadn’t done that, and now it’s too late! There were two honorable men in my life, but because they were in the background of my life, I didn’t really see their contribution to my life. They were both neighbors whom I met in my childhood; one was my best friend’s dad, the other was their next-door neighbor. I had gone to school with both of their daughters and had always admired the interaction between the fathers and their daughters.

The other night I was thinking back on the lives of both of those honorable men. One I called Uncle Mac, the other Mr. Nelson. Uncle Mac was not my biological uncle; he became my unofficial uncle because his daughters and wife had adopted my sister and me as their cousins and nieces. When we moved next door to them, it really felt like a family reunion. They were the only children in the neighborhood who cared anything about my sister and me, because we were the outcasts among them. It’s funny, because my adopted cousins even called us their cousins to the neighbors they had lived around for years. They knew we weren’t blood relatives, but my cousins wouldn’t allow them or anybody to think of us other than their family.

To me, Uncle Mac was a quiet man. He worked hard, took care of his family, and tended his backyard garden. And he could cook his butt off! But what impressed me the most about him was the stories that his daughters told us about how he would creep into their bedroom on the day after payday, while they were sleeping, and lay out envelopes for each of his four daughters filled with allowance money. He thought they had never heard him, but they had. It touched my heart so much because my sister and I never received an allowance for our chores, and we practically ran the house. I had never even heard of an allowance until I met my best friend.

What Uncle Mac never knew is that his honoring his daughters indirectly honored me and my sister. We never had any spending money, and they always shared with us. Even his wife shared food with us during our season of lack, from their full deep freezer. Later on, when I had my daughter and assigned her chores, I decided to give her an allowance.

I didn’t have much, but I wanted to do what Uncle Mac had done for his daughters—honor their hard work, help them know how to manage money, and position them to be givers (first with God, and then with others they could bless). Uncle Mac never knew he had taught me such valuable lessons that I could pass on to my child and grandchildren, who are happy beneficiaries of an allowance.

Mr. Nelson also added value to my family indirectly, as I admired what a loving and gentle father he was with his wife and four children. We often played at his house; in the sunroom they had built onto the back porch. I wished for a father like him.

Both of those honorable men will never know the contribution they made to my life and family, because I never got to tell them, but God knows, and I hope he will reward them for me. Both elders passed away only days apart at the beginning of 2020. One tragically died in a fire, the other because of illness. Even though they are no longer with us, the memories of their honorable sacrifices for their families will always remain with us.

I just want to remind us all to think of the unsung heroes in our lives. They may not be front and center in our lives, but they still have a place of honor. Give them the honor they deserve because indirectly they have honored us. Mother Teresa quotes: “Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love.”

All I can say about that is, amen!!!

Prayer:

Father, help us not to overlook the people in our lives that bring value, simply because they are in the background. Help us as loved ones, friends, and neighbors to remember their love, and to rejoice in the good times we share or have shared. In the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.